How Did You Get So Fat?

Why do I even try to begin to avoid these kinds of foods this time of year when it’s everywhere?

To say I’m discouraged about my choices the past two days would be an understatement.  I am weak.  I am weaker than a stinking piece of candy.  I am weaker than a brownie.  I am weaker than a biscuit.

That doesn’t do much for one’s self-esteem, does it?

I am feeling pretty low and hopeless.  That’s what keeps me fat most of all — the hopelessness I feel.  The feeling that I’ll never get my act together, that I’ll never have the backbone to stand up to an M & M, that I’ll never be able to find the fortitude to lace up the shoes and move and burn more calories than I take in.

There’s always and excuse not to do better.  And I hate that.  It’s a vicious cycle.  I hate myself for not being strong enough and because I’m hating myself I self-destruct.

Sugar is my drug.  I admit it.  I am powerless over it.

I have spoken.

picture via www.babble.com